Bad Day

Jakarta, Aug 31 2018


Have you ever been in the situation when you want to scream out but you can't? When you want to tell the world something but you just can't? When you have so many thoughts that you can't explain. The tears you can't drop, the time you can't stop. Everything seems messed up at the moment and you... you just keep quiet, nothing to do with it. You try to reach people but they only hear, not listen. You feel like you are on the lowest point of your life. You never feel like this before. You feel like, no one can truly understand what you feel and what you've been through. You are the only one savior for yourself. Then you become afraid, afraid of what they will say about your problem. You are afraid that you'll be considered as a complainer, too emotional, you are weak, you are loser. The fact is, they really don't know what happens to your own life. They are busy with theirs. Everyone has problem. Everyone has his/her own struggle.

Well, her sky was cloudy lately. She didn't feel okay. She faced some new challenge. The new regulation, new environment, new sad things she couldn't speak out. So far, she was in joy doing what she was doing. There were no stressful days. Until one day she arrived at the moment when she lost her close mates. But it was still fine. She went on and on. Never complaining anything. She did everything with gratitude. She did her best. Then those days came. The days she didn't feel right. Just weary. Maybe just weary and she went on and on. One evening, her brain couldn't work out. Her battery was getting low. Hurricane everywhere. She couldn't think straight. She lost. It was the peak of "have you ever been in the situation when you want to scream out but you can't?". She just wanted to cry. "Am I doing well? Feels like I failed, but I don't wanna stop. Is it clear? Is it wrong? Is it normal?".

Yes, it was normal. Because she was just a human being. Just a tiny girl who was trying to figure the life out. Just a little employee in a big big big city who was not so ready for change. Just 23yo who was entering an adulthood. No body said it was easy. That was transition and she knew for sure. After working hour was over, she met a friend at the lobby. He came for giving her ride and going home together. The night had no stars. The cars seemed so bored because of traffic. They reached the highway and sang some good songs. She just followed the melody, trying to forget the hurricane. Suddenly "Bad Day" from Daniel Powter was played on the radio. "God, this is so me," and she laughed. She looked out of the window while biting her Oreos, thinking of WHAT HAD HAPPENED and WHAT WOULD HAPPEN. She had no idea. She couldn't let herself lost in this kind of situation. She had to get over it. She must live for her present. The morning after that day, the morning after she had a heavy converstaion about job, adulthood, and life (obviously) with her parents last night, she fixed it all. She may only need time to breath, to figure it out, and to be bold to step out of her house and face the reality. She said that it was not only about job, about office drama, about other people, but it was all about her. She and her own fighting. She and her ego. She and her liability. She and her courage. She and her challenge. She and her mental building.

Yes, there might be some points in life where you feel so blue and so down but it's normal. We're just human. We all are a little bit broken but that's okay. There might be some points in life where you feel so tired but it's fine. You can quickly take back your energy and power to be a stronger you. Don't worry, you are not alone. Life may throw you rocks, but don't you ever feel sad any longer if you believe in god. La Tahzan (Ali Imran : 139). God never sleeps. God won't ever put you in the situation that you can't handle. So, get ready for the life surprises ahead! Don't forget that there are still a lot of kind people out there, people who care, people who won't let you alone. Don't be sad, it's just a bad day, not a bad life.



September 2, 2018
PR.

Komentar

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